Friday, January 8, 2010

My boyfriend had to tell me!!!

Im starting this blog because, I dont know I need some way of connecting with other people about being ana.
I never realized i was ana until I started looking it up on the internet a few years back.
I just thought I was ment to be a small person and never had much of an appeitite. I used to be heavy into drugs in my teens and early 20's ( well im only 25) so I never ate much then either. I was about 99 lbs 5'2. I never ate. dont get me wrong I love food but high suppresses your apeitite. After my recovery from drugs everyone kept telling me how great I was looking now that I was gaining weight. And I believed them!!! That was a mistake. I shot up to 135! and im a small person so that really looks weird on me. Well after I had enough of that I went back to ana and i got down to a perfect 105!!! then everyone started with the "your lossing so much weight" "you need to eat" pitty party on me. So I listened again and here I am 25 and super unhappy with how I look. My boyfriend said to me the other day when he caught me undressing in the closet to hide my fat from him, "if its such a big deal do something about it!" AND IT HIT ME...
I LET FOOD CONTROL MY LIFE AGAIN! but not no more!!!!
I hope some of you who feel the same way will help me on my way to my target weight and stay strong with me. together we can burn the fat and beat food!

Today I am only taking in 500 calories. (i gotta start somewhere)
tomorrow I start my 24 hour fast, then ill take it from there. anyone with me?!
Ill keep posting